Why, O' Why??

"Why, O' Why?" was written in anguish a couple of months back. It is a reflection of times that changed the course of my life... Did not have the heart to upload it then, but doing so today when I feel no more... When my heart is painfully numb 'n my soul is ... Dead!!

You entered my life, unexpectedly...
Sweeping it in a flow,

Why, O' Why knowing you so well,
...Did I ever let you do so?

Having gone through...
A broken heart 'n life's pains already,

Why, O' Why did I allow you to hold me,
...When I was not even ready?

Knowing for sure your nature...
You'd walk out on me one day,

Why, O' Why did I ever,
...Let you enter my heart 'n cross my way?

Never believing...
What all the purportedly biased world had to say,

Why, O' Why did I believe you, 
...Trust you alone for all you had to array?

Spending time, waking nights...
listening, loving you from core of my heart,

Why, O' Why did I nurture faith in a forlorn lost soul,
...'n believe it wouldn't tear me apart?

Claiming to have lived a loveless, rejected life...
Hoping for someone to hold you through,

Why, O' Why could you not see the love,
...That wanted to stay 'n help you start life anew?

I graced you 'n your empty life...
With love, passion, understanding 'n unbridled care,

Why, O' Why then thanklessness 'n indifference,
...Were all you could spare?

Embracing to heal, snatch you from demons of time...
Who'd left you feeling lone 'n betrayed,

Why, O' Why did you then violate my being,
...With deeds, words of venom 'n hatred?

You'd claims of being a giver...
Compassion-portrayed with O' love so selfless,
Why, O' Why then reciprocate my adoration,
...With banishing rejection, hatred, humiliation 'n loneliness?

If friends with benefits, business partners...
Was all you ever wanted our relationship to be,

Why, O' Why then feel compelled,
...To lie, involve, lead, mislead, behold, saying you loved me??

You have justifications, reasons, n blames...
To clear your guilty heart 'n killing my loving soul,
Why, O' Why you haven't come forth to clear,
...Doubts, misunderstandings, 'n all that's taken toll??

Putting me through intolerable, gut-wrenching grief...
Calling me "Backstabber, a Stalker" in a venomous drawl,

Why, O' Why don't I still wish you the same searing pain,
...For smothering with a farce, my veracious soul? 

If this was all you could give me in return...

For all support, care 'n love I showered on you,
Why, O' Why do I still love...
...Your once O' so beautiful soul, one so true??
Why, O' Why did I have to ever love you, 
...With the passion 'n abandon I did 'n still do??
................................LOVE you, I still do!!